The Difficult Side of Being Yourself

 You Think It’s Hard To Fit In? Try NOT Fitting In…

I’ve accepted, talked about, and have damn near bragged about being nonconformist. I’ve described how liberating it is to not be bound by the chains of society, peers, or even fashion. I’ve shared how cool it is to love who you are and do what you do, without the slightest regard to the opinions of others  — even of those who are close to you.  I’ve said that “weirdos” are inventors — not consumers. I’ve also said that so-called “odd people” add flavor to what would be a very bland world.

I’ve applauded risk takers, because they are not afraid to take a chance on failure — even when they fail. I’ve also encouraged people to leave their comfort zone and dare to be who they truly are. And, not to “think outside of the box“, that cliche is largely used by those who have selectively open minds. I say, don’t even acknowledge that there is a box. Live in the now — the past and future does not exist. Wear mix-matched shoes and socks, or wear a kilt if you so desire.  I’ve tried to inspire you all to be the youest you that you can be.  And you know what?


Look Before You Leap

Before you jump into a nonconformist, bohemian lifestyle, you have to be careful to not alienate yourself.  It’s very easy to do, because many people will not understand you and others will test you. Most of the rest will speak ill of you, and a few will take interest. You’ll have to be strong enough to endure criticism and scrutiny, yet remain calm and in the zone that makes you (not them) comfortable.  Believe me, it’s not easy.  And sometimes, it can be hurtful.

Don’t Become Nonconformist Only For The Sake of Being Nonconformist

I’ll say it again: you must be true to yourself! If you are real with yourself, and not living a facade, it’s worth scrutiny and critique.  But, you should never be “different” or eccentric for the sole purpose of standing out — or, even worse, because it has become fashionable. Not giving your true self, means that you are selling yourself out.  And, in the end, you’ll find yourself to be one confused soul, with no idea of who you really are. Often, confusion has resulted in mental disorders and even suicide — but, so has living a life that doesn’t work, all because someone (or some people) told you that it was the “right thing to do“.

Being Your True Self Can Be A BIG Hat To Wear

When I first started wearing my Afro (which was several years ago. Back when very few people were wearing the style), people would ask me questions about it, like: How did I “grow it out“? How long did it take? How do I take care of it? While other people stared, sneered, laughed, pointed, and made snide remarks.  It never bothered me because, wearing my Afro makes me feel great — it always has, as it is an extension of me representing the pride I have for myself as well as where I come from. So, when people were (or are) derogatory towards me for being brave enough to be myself and love myself; I actually feel sorry for them.

People often expressed interest in the look and wanted to try the style out for themselves. One thing that I would always tell those people is that they have to be prepared, and strong enough to endure ridicule from those who won’t understand.  Some people are too conservative to accept that there is a counterculture, and we have the right to be who we are,  even though it does not coincide with the societal mold that we are all expected to fit into. The same can be said about tattoos and piercings.  When you decide to throw caution to the wind, and do the things that make you feel good, you can’t allow naysayers to engage you and try to convince you that you are wrong. Stand tall and proud, and love yourself. Remember, this is about you, feeling so good that you can give the world the amazing gift of your best you. Besides, when what you are doing reaches Pop-culture, everyone will be doing it, and they’ll conveniently forget how they once made it their paramount objective to make you feel horrible about yourself.  People can be such sheep…

Don’t Let Them Change Your Mind

Finding yourself can take time, so don’t rush it. Dig deep, and first, figure out what distracted you from the beginning, and then, slowly come out of your shell, at your own pace.  However, when you have evolved into the person that has been trapped inside of you, for perhaps, your entire life, DO NOT allow the status quo to change your mind.  Keep the discomfort that you felt when you were “going along to get along” in your mental rolodex, and refer to it as necessary.  Remember how hard you’ve worked to get to a place where you are happy, at peace, Zen.

The Universe recognizes what is real, and what isn’t. It will try to lead you to authenticity, but ultimately, it’s up to you.  Universal Law: What you put into the Universe will be returned unto you.  With that being said, if you are phony, you will be rewarded with more phoniness.


Be aware. Be strong. Be prepared. Be convicted. Be steadfast. Be resilient. Be proud. Be YOU! As long as you are being honest with yourself, and not hurting anyone — including yourself… Do you, Boo Boo!

“Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to heredity.”

~Albert Einstein 

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